Giving Thanks
2004-12-11
@ 9:45 a.m.
Friends have been asking me "When will she be back?" or "Are you looking forward to it?" and sometimes even more ridiculous questions like "Are the two of you back together already?"
Yea of course I'm happy that she's back. I'm happy for her, that is. She'll have time to spend with her family and friends. She'll have time to rest and enjoy her vacation, so yea, I'm happy for her. Am I happy about it? I don't even know how I'm supposed to feel about it. I once said that if it happens, it happens. Since what we started had turned out this way, I suppose that's the way it was meant to be. I've laid my hopes six feet under.
Friends say I've changed, I smile and ask if they like it. Quieter, friendlier, some say I seem afraid whenever the subject of relationship is being brought up, and the most recent remark I heard: Less spirited.
To those of my friends who know better, I thank you. You have given me the strength and support that I sometimes stubbornly refuse. I'm not quite there yet, its gonna take some more time, but yea it'll happen one day, maybe without me even realising it.